That’s Not Love, That’s Creepy – “You’re Sixteen” (vi)

For your consideration: Johnny Burnette’s “You’re Sixteen”


The rockabilly singer was born in 1934 and released the song in 1960.

Do the math any way you like on that, but “statutory” is the final calculation.

Especially endearing are the lines “You’re mine” “You’re my pet”— it’s like the song is about purchasing the lucky young woman from her father like she’s chattel.

And “ribbons and curls, ooh what a girl” ? I know it’s a dated song, but it’s just an insult to the awesome and brilliant 16 year old girls everywhere. 16-year-old-me would have given him a death-glare.

No man over 18 or 19 should sing this song. Ever.

Oh wait, Ringo Starr did a remake of it.


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