Thoughts on hypothetical unicorn pet ownership

A really awesome looking unicorn.

On a scale of one to ten, when it comes to drawing in photoshop, my skill levels are "awesome."

Pros:
♥ Pony rides. All the time.
♥ I bet they grant wishes.
♥ Kids aged 0-12 would think I’m awesome.
♥ Those over 12 would also think I’m awesome. Oh, they wouldn’t admit it, but I’d know.
♥ The unicorn would have other magical friends and we’d all have awesome adventures together.
♥ Book deals. Tours.
♥  Magical transportation powers? I sure do hope so!
♥ Tons of prancing and frolicking in meadows.
♥ Unless My Little Ponypropaganda has been lying to me since I was 4 years old: wicked cool slumber parties.

Movie poster for "Legend"

Do I want my life to have a Tangerine Dream soundtrack? I doubt it.

Cons:
♥ Unicorns are probably self-righteous jerks, since they’re all magical, pure and good and weird stuff like that. I don’t want to be judged every time I crack open a beer.
♥ Rainbow manure. In the end, it’s still manure.
♥ Upkeep costs. I mean, what do they eat? Eventually the touring deals would run out, and I don’t want to be stuck footing the bills for diamond-ruby-sapphire-oats.
♥ My cat would be jealous.
♥ Everyone would be after the unicorn. Governments, corporations and magical beasties. I don’t particularly want to face-off against devil Tim Curry. I strongly suspect Tom Cruise has gone soft.
♥ Would I have to get insurance? Would my premiums go up if there was an accidental impaling?

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5 Responses to Thoughts on hypothetical unicorn pet ownership

  1. Leanne Beck says:

    Ok, I laughed out loud multiple times on this one! lol.

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